“Sex With Humans Is Boring” Woman Who ‘Makes Love With Elves’ Says

A woman claims she has sex with elves and she prefers them to humans because sex with humans is boring.

Hallgerdur Hallgrimsdottir, who said she was an elf sex expert and has even written a book called Please YoursELF, claimed she had “loads of orgasms” while enjoying love-making with elves. She revealed the mytgical creatures have “glittery” sperm and are “very flexible”.

She said during an interview with Vice:

“Sex with humans is boring. Elves sort of know what you want in bed. They don’t need to ask what you want, they can read your mind and maybe even know better of what you want than you do which is very incredible.”

Speaking of the elves’ bodies, she said:

“They are very flexible so can use potions which would not be possible as human beings.”

Showing a book of elf sex positions, she said: “This is a picture of one of the crazy positions that an elf can do.”

In it the elf is bent over backwards, his head facing skywards.

Speaking of another photo, she said: “He’s standing up and she’s sort of up with her feet on his shoulders. He’s performing oral sex on her. They have incredible tongues.”

She added that size isn’t an issue with elves, saying. “With elves, size doesn’t matter.”

Speaking of their sperm, she said: “Elf sperm is quite shimmery, glittery.”

Describing what it’s like to make love to an elf, she said: “You will definitely have an orgasm with a elf. I’ve had loads of them.”

Many Icelandic people believe elves exist.

A National Geographic article suggested 54 percent of Icelandic people believed that elves existed, although descriptions of what they looked like varied, The Sun UK reports.