In many families especially those of African descend,parents tend to believe that they have absolute monopoly over their children and you will see them express such autocratic disposition with words like”I am your mother,I am your father,we are your parents and we know what is good for you””

Yes i agree that most times if not all the time,they tend to believe they have our interest at heart but the unfortunate fact is that in most cases,they are only forcing down our throat what they belove is actually good from their self centered perspective.

The most bizarre twist to this is when they cross the line by wanting to dictate the tide of our emotions and will always want to lay down a module for our heart to follow thereby practically complicating the lives of their children with their autocratic,self centered and archaic mindset.
Here are 5 ways many parents complicate the marital future of their own children.

1.They tell us not to marry from a particular tribe::Like seriously! What has tribe got to do with matters of the heart? What if all the people i meet from my tribe are not what i want?i guess i must marry one of them just to boost my parents ego…Nah!

2.They want us to marry from a particular religion::This will make sense to some religion fanatics but i guess if my dad obeyed his parent i will not be in existence today. Religion as important as it is must never create a divide when it comes to matters of the heart and in-fact my growing up was fun as my dad calls me Lukman(My Muslim name) and i will gladly answer while my mum calls me by my regular name.Each of my siblings were christened the Muslim way in the morning and the Christian way in the afternoonDuring Christmas we enjoyed the chicken and during Muslim festivals we enjoyed the ram.
In-fact my dad loved my mum deeply till he passed on at 73 so in my own world i see nothing wrong in the wife and husband practicing different religion as long as there is religion tolerance..

3.They use their children as battle pawns::This one is indeed a very crazy one.Have you seen a situation where a parent realizes their son or daughter is in love with another person from a family they have discord with?
Please if you want to continue your fight just leave your children out of the issue,you have your life to live and your children hav theirs..please live and lets live.

4.They tell us not to marry from a poor background::This is the most pathetic of all and this usually happens among the rich and the poor. The rich parents believe every other person from a humble background is out to milk them dry so they tell their children to look for a fellow rich partner from a rich home and even when this becomes a Herculean task,they will resort to arrangee wedding thereby destroying the matrimonial lives of their children as the marriage usually breaks down even before it starts.
For the hopelessly poor parents,they will tell their children especially the females to shine their eyesand not bring home a poor guy thereby forcing their daughters to sell themselves to highest bidders who will see them as nothing more than a bought object and discard them when they are done with them. That is why many struggling guys shy away from visiting some parents of their partners because by the time they drill you and they find out you are still a hustler,your case is a sorry case.

5.They tell us that our stars do not match ::Chai! this one is beyond me. You will see a situation where some parents will take the name of any man or lady that comes into the life of their children straight to one baba,pastor or alfa to check if your stars match(Whatever that means) and most times these spiritualists will just tell them trash and they will come back to their child to say “Ehm,you see we went somewhere and they said..” Taarh! Rubbish and nonsense. Are they GOD?

6.They make insane demands from the suitors of their daughters ::This is seen in some tribes in Nigeria where they will give you funny list with items amounting to hundreds of thousands and even over a million not minding how you get the money and this has turned many ladies from such tribe to be objects used and dumped by guys who are not ready to go through that greedy and extortive process not because they don’t love the lady but they just can’t afford it.

Many children have eloped for life and some committed suicide out of frustration and many have killed one of their parent just to have their way so i will advice parents to respect their children’s decisions and let them make their choices.Yes give them advice as parents but let them make their choice.

Hope this make sense.