“Mothers should not feel guilty for choosing themselves and doing whatever they need” Simi reacts to Chimamanda’s conversation on the “cost” of motherhood

Simi has reacted to Chimamanda Adichie’s conversation on the cost of motherhood.

The singer said she can relate to Chimamanda’s experience about motherhood.

In an interview with BBC, Chimamanda said motherhood is a “glorious gift” though it comes at a “cost”. She also talked about the “brain freeze” and loss of creativity that comes with pregnancy (read here). She added that she probably would have written two more novels had she not had a child.

Reacting, Simi said women should be given grace because motherhood is not easy.

Simi wrote: “She captured this so beautifully. I remember I had the creative brain freeze too when I was pregnant. It shocked me lol. I’d never felt anything like that before.

“Every mother’s journey is different. Some are happy to ‘lose’ whatever they lose. For others, it’s just a bit too much. Your only job is to support her, not judge her experience.

“I hope we can actually see mothers more and not just the beautiful babies. Mothers should not feel guilty for choosing themselves sometimes and doing whatever they need to be the kind of mothers they need to be. Because, trust me, majority of the time, they have to choose someone else.

“So many moms are struggling with depression and can’t speak about it because they’re afraid to be judged as bad moms. You’re not a bad mommy. You’re a person. And you deserved to be seen.

“Lastly, in my opinion, saying “just have all your kids and get it out of the way” is such a careless thing to say. Children don’t get out of the way – unless you’re not actually planning to raise them.

She concluded with, “prayers and love to women TTC (trying to conceive). I see you too.”

Simi also shared messages she received from other mothers who shared their motherhood experience, including one who said she will not recommend motherhood and another who said she has no intention of having a second child due to her experience.

See below.