LOL:- The Chronicle Of 9jaflaver Jokes (Get In Here)

Dating A Slim Guy is very Sexy and Romantic, until Breeze blows him away from the Relationship…

A teacher’s letter to a parent:

“Dear Parent, Ayo, your son, doesn’t smell nice in school. Kindly encourage him to take his bath.”

Parent replies:
“Dear Teacher, Ayo is not a rose flower. Don’t smell him, just teach him! Thank you.”

My sister don’t be fooled by men….
Not everybody that wears suit are rich…
Some of them are chior masters

My Brother you wear one boxer for seven days and you clean your chair before you seat down in church ? I have nothing to tell you Bro…… Just Go

You spend the whole day on social media ,You don’t wash your own clothes,You don’t even know where the broom is kept in your house. As that’s not enough you can’t even cook simple vegetables. My sister your bride price should be 1 Facebook LIKE and 2 Comments

I slowly shifted her panty to the side and removed my boxer. This habbit of sharing the dry line with ladies is so annoying

What were you thinking ? Am not a bad Child now…

You would know you are watching a Nigerian movie when it says “35yrs later “but the dog in the yard is still alive.

What happened to West Life?
Early 2000’s they were everywhere.
But now I wonder how, I wonder why, I wonder where they are…

What Made A Soldier Wife Punch Off One Of My Eye

Ayo: Madam, swimming is prohibited in this lake.

Soldier’s Wife: Why didn’t you tell me when I was removing my clothed ?

Ayo: Because that’s not prohibited.”

Ayo The Dummy Boyfriend.

Kiki invited her boyfriend (Ayo) over for dinner in her house so he could  meet her parents.

While they were eating, it started raining heavily that Kiki’s mother said;”Ayo, I think you should sleep over here because the rain shows no sign of stopping soon”.

After eating, Kiki’s Mum & Dad went into their room while she went to clean up the plates. By the time she returned from the kitchen Ayo was no where to be found. They checked all over the house but couldn’t find him.

While still wondering where he could have gone, he walked back into the house fully wet with a small pillow in his hand.

Kiki’s Mother: Where have you been and why are you so wet?
Ayo: You said you think I should sleep here… So I went home to get my small pillow.

Funniest Confession Ever By Johnny.

After Feeling Guilt For What Happened Some Night Ago… Johnny Went To The Priest For Confession.

Johnny: I almost had an affair with a woman that is not my wife.

Priest: What do you mean by almost?

Johnny: Well, we got undressed and rubbed together but then I stopped myself.

Priest: Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You are not to see that woman again for your penance, say 5 Hail Mary’s and put N5000 in the poor box.

Johnny:  Left the confessional, said his prayers and then walked over to the poor box. On getting to the poor box, he paused for a moment and then started to leave.

The priest who was watching quickly ran over to him and said; I saw that you didn’t put any money in the poor box.

Johnny: Yes! But I rubbed it on the box. And according to you, Rubbing is the same as putting it in.

After fighting on the street, Police came for Johnny and he ran into his room.

Police : (Knocking!!!)

Johnny : Who is knocking?

Police : It’s the Nigeria Police.

Johnny: What do you want?

Police : We just want to talk.

Johnny : How many of you are there ?

Police : Just two of us.

Johnny : Ok. Talk to each other then.

Johnny was about to check into a hotel in Lagos when he noticed a very beautiful lady staring admiringly at him. As a sharp guy he walked over and spoke with her for some minutes then returned to the front desk where they both checked in as Mr. and Mrs. Johnny.

After a very pleasurable three days stay, Johnny approached the front desk and told the clerk he was checking out. In a few minutes, he was handed a bill of  N500,000.

Johnny: There must be some mistake; I’ve only been here for three days.

Clerk: Yes Sir! But your wife has been here a month and a half.

Johnny: (FAINTED)

Johnny comes home late, fully drunk, falls down on the floor and started vomiting all over the room. His wife pulls him up and cleans everything.

The Next day when he gots up, he was expecting  his wife to be really upset with him and was praying  they won’t have a fight.

But to his surprise, he finds a note near the table that reads: “Honey, your breakfast is ready on the table, I had to leave early to buy groceries. I love you.”

He was so surprise that he ask his son about what happened last night and his son tells him: “When mom pulled you to bed and was trying to remove your boots and shirt, you were dead drunk that you started saying: “Hey lady! Leave me alone… I’m married!

After two months of applying for job in an organization, Ayo was finally call for an interview and was determined to get the job at all cost.

Interviewer: There are two main rules for our company to select you.

Ayo: What is it sir ?

Interviewer: Our second rule is Cleanliness, did you wipe your feet on the mat near the door before coming in?

Ayo: Yes sir! I wiped it twice.

Interviewer: Our First rule is trustworthiness, and for your information there isn’t any mat near the Door.

Ayo and Fat Johnny were on their way to work when a fast moving tricycle hit Johnny. Ayo then quickly dial an emergency number for help.

Ayo: Please, send an ambulance fast! My friend just had an accident. He’s bleeding from the nose and ears, and I think both of his legs are broken!

Emergency Service: Where is your location?

Ayo: Njo-ku-ei-susu-uwa-nbe Street.

Emergency Service: Please spell the street name.

Ayo: Ah! Ok. Give me a minute.

Emergency Service: Are you there?

Ayo: [Now silent]

Emergency service: Hey, mister! Are you there ?

Ayo: [Panting& Breathing hard] Yes! Yes!!  So
sorry for the delay. I couldn’t spell Njo-ku-ei-susu-uwa-nbe Street. So, I’ve dragged him to Adams street. Should I spell Adams for you ?

(Ayo enters a church to meet the priest)
Priest: How may I help you son?

Ayo: I’m looking for my wife, she said she would be here but as I can see she’s not around. Now that am here, I would like to make some confession.

Priest: Ok. Then go on with your confession.

Ayo: Forgive me Father for I have sinned

Priest: What are your sins my son?

Ayo: The other day, I went looking for my wife at her home but she was not there. I found her sister alone and I slept with the sister.

Priest: Oh, that is a big sin, but at least you came to confess.

Ayo: Then another day I went looking for her at her aunt’s place but she was not there, I found her cousin alone and I slept with the cousin.

Priest: You know that is wrong my son. It’s another big sin.

Ayo: Then the other day I went looking for her at her work place. She was not there, I found her colleague alone.

Priest: Let me guess, you slept with her colleague

Ayo: Yes father

(Then there was total silence after that)

Ayo: Father! Are you there?

(Ayo peeps through and finds out that the priest is no longer
there. He started looking for him and find him hiding)

Ayo: Why are you hiding Father?

Priest (Shaking with fear): I’ve just realized you came looking for your wife and I’m the only one here.