“Pay school fees yourself” – Man explains why children see mothers as irreplaceable and fathers as absent

A Nigerian man has sparked conversations online after sharing his views on why many children grow up believing their mothers are irreplaceable, while fathers are often seen as absent or irrelevant.

According to him, the discussion started after he came across a post that read, “Mothers are irreplaceable.” Curious, he said he asked the lady who shared the post whether her father was also irreplaceable.

“She said yes, because the mother carries the pregnancy, gives birth, breastfeeds the child, and nurtures the child,” he explained.

The man argued that this mindset is common because mothers play their roles visibly, while fathers often play theirs behind the scenes.

He noted that when children are sick, it is their mother they see caring for them.

When school fees are paid or clothes are bought, many fathers provide the money through their wives, which makes it appear as though the mother is doing everything.

“Children believe what they see. The school fees na their mama dem dey see pay am, the clothes na their mama dem dey see buy am,” he said.

According to him, most mothers do not take the time to explain to their children that the father is the one hustling, providing, and securing their future quietly.

He advised fathers to stop playing their roles through their wives and instead make their efforts visible by being present when paying school fees, buying clothes, and handling responsibilities directly.

Many reactions followed the post. One commentator wrote, “You lied. My mother took care of us and we still give credit to our father.” Another said, “True. Children only remember what they see.”

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